Please and Thank You

I hate how people talk to each other these days. I grew up on Please and Thank you, would you mind, could you please... But, these days people tell other people what they "need to" do. It bugs the snot out of me. I have been guilty of it in the past. Everyone is subject to pick up bad habits from other people if they are exposed to it for too long. So, I make a conscious effort to ask rather than tell people what to do. If I would like a favor from someone I ask them if they will do me a favor. "Can you please pick up some onions for dinner tomorrow" rather than, "You need to pick up some onions for dinner tomorrow". No one wants to be told what to do unless they are getting paid to do it. Furthermore, not even your boss should tell you what "you need to" do. I was taught that you catch more bees with honey. When I am told what I "need to" do, I feel resentful while doing whatever favor I am doing. If I am asked politely, I happily perform the task and feel truly appreciated for having been helpful because I was properly asked.

Since when did "you need to" become the standard for asking for help? You know who says "you need to"? Someone who is robbing you at gunpoint. You know who asks you to "please get me a soda?" People who love you, respect you, and truly appreciate the time you took to help them out.

Say please and thank you and you will have more favors done for you in response.

Weird Instincts

Call me crazy...that's OK! I am fine with that. But, I have a crazy sense of instinct. I always get a little tingly feeling in the pit of my stomach when something good or bad is about to happen. I don't always follow the path my instincts are screaming at me. And, I often find myself figuratively kicking myself in my own butt afterward.

One such instance where my instincts were screaming at me was back in 1992 when a guy I was interested in was killed in a car accident. I was working at McDonald's. It was how we met because he was working at the DIY (a Do It Yourself home improvement store like Home Depot or Lowes) across the parking lot from me. He would come in for his lunch break and, no matter how crowded my line was, he would jump into the end of my line and wait for me to help him. I was seeing someone else when we first met one another but, that relationship was at the end of its rope. In fact, it took me a while before I realized that the guy liked me. Either he wasn't very obvious or I was kind of oblivious. I ended things with my then boyfriend and one of my co-workers came clean with how the guy felt about me. Of course I always noticed him a little. He was sweet and adorable and he always made me laugh when he would come in. We exchanged phone numbers and were really only starting to get to know one another. We never went out and he was gearing up to ask me to his school's formal dance. He was a senior in high school and I was a freshmen in college.

So, I was working when I could have sworn that he came in the door. I felt it. I can't really explain it other than to say that my entire body tingled a little and, I remember looking toward the door expecting him to come walking toward my line. But, he wasn't there. While I don't remember the time of day this happened now, I did notice the time back then because it would have been getting close to his lunch break. So, I still sort of waited throughout the rest of the day, hoping to see him. But, he never showed. It was towards the end of my shift and I was working in the drive-thru when a couple of our mutual friends came to my window. They asked me if I had heard about what happened to him. They told me that he was in an accident and, they weren't sure how he was. They only knew that he was in an accident. So, a few minutes later, I got off my shift and headed home. I went to the phone and dialed his number. His Dad answered and when I asked for him, his Dad asked me who was calling. After I told him who I was, he apologized to me and told me that he was no longer with us. I broke down. My family did all they could to comfort me. And, when his obituary and the story of his accident made it into the paper, I saw the time the accident had happened and it was the same time that I had the tingly feeling throughout my body and had expected him to walk through the door.

To this day, I don't know if it was his spirit touching me and saying good-bye or if it was just my own connection to him that gave me that feeling. All I know is that I definitely felt something and, that was not the first, nor the last time, that my "Spidey Senses" have given me a little kick when I should know something. And, my "Spidey Sense" is never wrong. There are times when I know exactly what I am tingling about. Other times, it is just a tingle for an event to be seen. A lot of times, it is for something good that is going to happen. Sometimes it will be attached to a person that I think about and then I hear from them either that day or a few days later. I frequently have it happen for something that I am about to do wrong. I've felt it days, or even minutes before I get busted for speeding down the highway. I've felt it when a family member gets injured. I've even felt it when my hubby is mad at me for some reason yet to be discovered.

So, call it "Women's Intuition". Call me a psychic. Call me crazy. I only know that I often know things that I have yet to figure out I know. And my instincts never fail me. I just need to stop failing them.

Update: From Zero To 3

I just found out that my friend, who was injured in Afghanistan, was actually hit by an IED (Improvised Explosive Device). He and his men were hit and, I still don't know all of the specifics but, he fractured a bone in his spine but, he will heal and be fine. I have a hard time calling him lucky. Yes, he got out of the situation with his life and, he gets to come home to the states and retire from the military. But, how close was he to being one of the unlucky? I think that I don't even want to know because I swear that I can feel my heart break a little if I dare to think about it too hard. Maybe it is selfish to try to just remove myself from too much thought about it. But, I can actually feel my heart skip a beat, which I can only equate to it breaking, when I let my mind comprehend the very danger of it. And, I still know two other men in Afghanistan whose lives I worry about.

I heard from one of them the other day. He's doing well...as well as he can given where in this world he is right now. And, I was so thrilled to hear from him. It meant so much to me because I've been so worried about him. I only hope that I conveyed how thrilled I was to hear from him and that he knows how much it meant to me. And, I hope to continue to hear from him on a fairly regular basis because, worried doesn't even begin to describe it.

So, I just wanted to reach out and remind everyone to keep those in service in your thoughts. Whether you know someone who is deployed in a danger zone or not, they could still use all the positivity you can send their way.

Modern Technology Can Be Hurtful

I have said that I am a huge fan of modern technology. I love the way that it makes our lives easier. From less painful mammography machines, to ways that make an eye exam less impactful on the rest of your day. One of my favorite rewards of modern technology is the ability to stay in touch with everyone. I've blogged about it before. But, with the ability to stay in touch with people comes the ability to rid yourself of those whom you have decided you don't want to be in touch with anymore as well. Modern Technology has also given us the DELETE button. It is great for getting rid of mistakes you make when typing something. But, it has also been incorporated into the world of social networking sites and it is really hurtful. I have been deleted a few times. Most recently, by a family member who completely misunderstood one of my status updates in Facebook. I saw a t-shirt on a teenager that cracked me up. The t-shirt read, "I am a Waffle House Kid". For those who aren't familiar, Waffle House is a 24 hour restaurant franchise most often found in the Southern states of the U.S. The food is greasy and completely unhealthy. And, because the restaurant is open 24 hours a day, it is often frequented by people who are just leaving the bar in the middle of the night after having had a lot of adult beverages. People often go there to get to know the man or woman they just met on the dance floor. It is often the stop they make before or after hooking up with their new companion. And, when you see someone leaving Waffle House in the early morning hours, they are probably wearing what they wore the night before to the bar. For that reason it is also referred to as "The Walk of Shame". So, upon seeing the t-shirt, I laughed myself to tears and promptly went home and posted the following status update on my Facebook profile: "saw a hilarious t-shirt on a teenager today. "I'm a Waffle House Kid". LMFAO! He might as well have had a t-shirt that said "I'm a Walk of Shame Kid". LOL!" My friends got a kick out of it and we all joked around in the resulting thread. That was until my niece-in-law took offense to it and told me I was being judgmental and that she was disappointed in me. I repeatedly told her that I was just joking about the shirt. I told her that I didn't have anything against the kid in the shirt. It wasn't about him. I saw the humor in the shirt and that was what my status was about. But, she refused to see that I was only clowning around about the t-shirt and insisted on believing that I was judging the kid in the shirt. I, in fact, said absolutely nothing about the kid in the shirt. Upon being pushed to say something about him, I told her what I really thought about the teenager. My impression of him was that he was a cutie. He seemed clean cut and well taken care of. He seemed happy and kind of like "every kid U.S.A." But, I truly gave no more thought about him. My laughter was about his t-shirt. So, after a few more pissed off comments from her and more apologetic comments from me trying desperately to smooth things over with her, she deleted me. That hurt. If I had done something deserving of being deleted, it still would have hurt but, I could and would have done my best to be understanding. Being deleted sucks! I have only ever deleted a few teenagers (perfect strangers) from my Myspace page because I would just prefer not to temp problems in the future with parents wondering why a 37 year old woman would be friends with their teenage son or daughter on Myspace. I am forever mindful of what I do and say online because I really don't want to get myself into trouble. But, you never know when someone will take something the wrong way and when trouble will thrust itself upon you.

So, modern technology is like a double edged sword. So fantastic in the way that it makes our lives easier. So potentially hurtful by re purposing the careless act of the "delete" button into a way to makes us something similar to a typo in someone else's life. And, that is how it has always made me feel. I am nothing more than a typo.

More Than Just For Cleaning Dirt

I love the Swiffer line of products. They make my life easier. I use the little 360 Dusters, the Wet Jet and the Sweeper Vac. They all cut down on the time it takes me to clean my house. They make it smell fantastic while I am cleaning. And now, my Sweeper Vac saves me the trouble of getting too close for comfort to any of the dinosaur sized spiders that make their way into my house late summer and throughout the fall. I am an arachnophobe. I hate those hairy freaks. Who needs that many dang legs? And, why do they think they should live in my house? Because I have such a fear of them, if I have to take care of one that gets into my house because no one else is around to handle it for me, I usually panic and miss hitting it with a shoe or stepping on it. I don't know how it works. I just know that my panic gives me horrendous aim. It can take multiple attempts before I succeed at my little mini-murder. And, as a result, the freaky little too-many legged hairy offender gets warning that I am after him and, about 7 out of 10 times, it gets away and I spend the next several hours freaking out until it emerges again and I get another chance to scare it away, and make a fool out of myself.

But, a few months ago I had a "Light bulb Moment" while standing frozen in place, in my kitchen, as one of those hairy little intruders stared me down. My Swiffer Sweeper Vac would suck that jerk up and keep him in its container until it starved to death. I know...that is severely inhumane and I should be ashamed of myself. But, guess what...it is my house, it is my paralyzing fear, and I will deal with it how I want to. If I am going to be punished in the future for torturing one of His creatures, I will stand in judgment and fess up and hopefully I will be forgiven. But, until that day...let this be a warning to those freaky, hairy, eight legged abominations. You are not welcome in my abode and I will rid you of my home the best way I know how.

Swiffer Sweeper Vac is like my own little Roach Hotel for spiders...Spiders go in but they don't come out!

Millionaire MissMatchmaker

Forgive me if I have posted about this before and, if I weren't so darn lazy, maybe I would comb through all of my old posts to see if I have or not. But, if I have...too bad. It's my blog and I'll repeat myself if I want to. So, :P

Anyway...I have a newly renewed old-fashioned disgust for Patti Stanger of The Millionaire Matchmaker. She is every kind of wrong in my book. She obviously thinks she is stunning and someone with whom other women should model themselves after as she constantly councils the women that she interviews for her millionaires, to straighten their curly hair and color their red hair any shade but red. And, it isn't just the women whose red hair she has such an aversion to. In this evening's episode, she asked a man if he would color his red hair another color and when he refused, she dismissed him. I have seen her call another woman ugly, to her face. The woman she called ugly was infinitely more stunning, gorgeous and beautiful than Patti. Maybe I am biased. I don't see an inch of beauty in Patti. She obviously had her lips blown up and they look awful. If I had to pay her a compliment, it would be that her hair shines like silk. But, it is a horrible style. Her voice is grating. I won't resort to being further insulting to her but, she really aught to take a look in the mirror before she calls the kind of woman who would make Angelina Jolie jealous, ugly.

And, she toots her horn as having "an extremely high success rate" in her matchmaking business. Yet, in probably 99% of the episodes, she has failed miserably at making a match. So, I would like to see where she is pulling her success rate from. Furthermore, she is 49 years old and, recently split from her fiancee. Of course, she blames him, after being together for 6 years, because he didn't want kids. I don't see her as being the nurturing type so, I fear for any children she might have. Anyway, my point is, if she still hasn't made a match for herself, one year from the big 50, how exactly does anyone have faith that she can find their match for them?

I really have a hard time digesting most of what she says. Now and then, she will give good wardrobe advice to some of the women who walk into the interview wearing tops that look like they belong on a girl 3 times younger and 6 times smaller than them. On occasions she will dole out good wardrobe advice to men who look like they came in from climbing a mountain. No one wants to date a shlub and, I agree that too much skin gives the wrong impression of a woman...and I am not a prude. I just think a little bit of cleavage goes a long way.

But, as for her advice that everyone needs to flat iron the crap out of their hair and that red isn't as beautiful as blond, brown or black...I call B.S. What is beautiful to one person is ugly to another, so...who is she to think she has the final say on beauty?

From Zero to 3

Up until this year, I haven't known anyone who was deployed to Afghanistan. And, now I know 3 men. One of them is a High School friend, I worked a summer job with one of them many years ago, and the last one is an acquaintance through a family member. My friend from High School was recently injured so, he is actually on his way back here to the states. And, he is able to retire now so, he will not be going back. Even though he suffered an injury, I'm thrilled for him and his family! But, since he was injured, it seems to have made it even more real for me, that I still know 2 other men in Afghanistan. I don't hear from the guy I worked with back in the day and I worry for him all the time. I don't really know if he is ok. I don't know how things are for him in Afghanistan and I just keep him, and his safety, on my mind and hope that he is doing well. The friend of my family member was deployed in June so, he is halfway through with his deployment. One of his friends posts a lot of pictures of him and his unit on Facebook and always tags him in them. Seeing those pictures is surreal for me. There is a lot of sitting around behind big rocks while holding huge big boy guns, smoking cigarettes and probably just chatting away their hours. To be honest, the first set of pictures he and his friend posted back in June, brought me to tears. Even though they were all posing and goofing off, I couldn't help but be taken by the sheer danger of it. There is never a time, when they are outside of their rooms, that they aren't holding their guns. Someone is always looking out in the background so that, even when they are trying to pass the time and feel a little normal by goofing off a little, someone is always looking out for their well-being. It is poetically disturbing. So, I worry for the 2 men that I know in Afghanistan. I hope for the quick recovery of my friend who is on his way back to the states. I wish I could keep in constant contact with my ex-coworker, or at least hear from him once in a very short while, so that I can know that he is safe. And, I keep an eye on the pictures of my family member's friend on Facebook, and his few Status Updates, and that helps me to know that he is doing ok. But, for now, I wish them all a safe deployment to Afghanistan, and a safe and healthy return to the states.

What Do You Think...Please Leave a Comment!

As you can see, I've changed my template and, I am trying to decide if it makes my posts a bit hard to read. I do feel that the color of the text makes a difference. Red text, like in "Some Stuff" is hard to read so, if I keep this template, I'll probably refrain from using red text. Anyway, please let me know what you think. If you have any suggestions, I'll be very happy to give it a shot and see how it works out in a future post. Thank you, in advance, for any suggestions or comments!

I Want To Scream It...Stop Rewriting History...

I dislike politics. Worse yet, I dislike talking politics...especially with people who are on the opposite side of the fence because, while I can hold a rational and calm conversation, a screaming match will ensue and I will inevitably back down because I refuse to be screamed at in an effort to change my mind when all I want is to have an adult disagreement. I am not wrong and neither are you where opinion is concerned.

That being said, I really dislike it when people try to rewrite history. So, here is my soap box. I was at my nail salon a week ago and President Obama was on their TV. One of the salon employees changed the channel and my manicurist told me that it was because they have literally had complaints from other salon patrons when Obama has been on the TV before. So, in an effort to make everyone "comfortable", as soon as they notice Obama on their TV, they change the channel. Seriously? I find that childish. I feel that, if you don't want to see something, simply don't look at it. If you don't want to hear something, simply don't listen to it.

I have listened to people lambaste President Obama for the economy. This is what I mean by rewriting history. Let's get this straight right now. I really want to scream this point but, I hold back because I will not play the middle woman between crazy and crazier. The economy was broken for 8 years before President Obama ever got into the Oval Office. President Bush had 8 years to break America's economy. How does one forget that? How is it possible that people think that the economy only broke starting 2 years ago? Furthermore, how do people think that President Obama can just snap his fingers and fix, in 2 years, what Bush spent 8 years breaking? President Obama is highly intelligent but, he isn't a magician. It is going to take time to repair 8 years of damage. I will never understand how something can be broken but acceptable until another person is in charge of it simply because the person who broke it was of political agreement and the new person in charge of it is in political disagreement. In other words, you lost your job when President Bush was in office and that was ok but, now since President Obama is in office and you are having a hard time finding a job, it is his fault. Right...that makes sense.

As I chatted with my manicurist, her original thought was that it was President Obama's fault. Then all I had to do was calmly remind her that things were broken while President Bush was in office, before President Obama took over. All I had to do was have her think back to nearly 3 years ago and it was amazing the change in tone that she had.

Open your eyes! Take a trip back down memory lane to when you started to struggle financially. I bet you will see it started before 2008. So, how about we try to hold all parties accountable to your struggles, as far as the government is concerned, and stop blaming the new guy just because he is a Democrat and you are a Republican. There is no such thing as rewriting history because it is literally impossible. You can not, no matter how bad you want to, go back in time and change what has already happened. Good luck trying. You'll just come across as an idiot to people who have a strong grasp on the reality of history.

To Shred, Or Not To Shred...

...that is the question.

I am almost and OCD shredder. I shred anything and everything with my name and address on it. If it isn't staying in my house, it goes through my shredder. And, what got me thinking about that topic was when I shredded the envelopes from last years Christmas cards sent to me from friends and family (I save them so I can use them as a reference for the following year, should I forget anyone on my card list). So, not only did I protect my identity, but I protected my friends' and family's' identities by shredding their addresses as well. Now, the question is...are my friends and family as courteous of my identity? Or, do they simply throw the envelopes with my address on it away? Perhaps I am a bit over-protective. It's not like someone stealing the envelope from the garbage would have my SSN or even my birthday. But, if they have my name and address, it is my opinion that they have enough information about me to make my life Heck. So, in an effort to protect myself, I don't take any chances and into the shredder that info goes.

What do you think? Am I too protective? Do you shred everything with your name and address? Or, do you do what I worry that others do and just toss the envelope with your info, and mine, right there in the garbage for anyone with bad intentions to steal?

Socially Networked

I truly am Socially Networked. I don't know how I ever survived without social networks like Facebook and Myspace. Nor do I know how I will survive if they ever cease to exist. I am also on Twitter but, I haven't entirely figured that one out yet. I feel like there is a key component I am missing to it. I will post an update now and then but, I guess I really just need to sit down and navigate around it more than I have.

Anyway, I became Socially Networked in June of 2008 when I used Myspace to find a friend with whom I'd lost touch with 11 years earlier. I have been hooked on the social networking sites since then. And, since then, I have reconnected with some of my besties from high school, a few of my college friends, ex-coworkers, family I don't get to see very often, family friends from my younger years and, I've even made a few new acquaintances.

I know very few people whom disagree with the social network sites. And to them I say, you don't know what you are missing. I understand that some people think these sites are dangerous. And, they can be. There are some sick people in the world. Couple that with hackers and it can be a dangerous world. But, if you are careful and mindful of what you are doing, you won't have anything to worry about.

I do wonder if the teens and 20-somethings that are Socially Networked, can truly appreciate what they have at their fingertips and, have had for a major portion of their lives. If you've never lost touch with people who played a big part of your lives in your formative years, can you really appreciate a site like Facebook and all the reminiscent reconnection it has to offer those of us who went more than a decade before getting back in touch with people we swore never to lose touch with in the first place?

So, I am endlessly grateful to my social networking sites of choice. I'm grateful that I have been reconnected with people whom I have truly missed and thought about a lot throughout the years. That being said, I miss those whom I still can't keep in touch with on a regular basis.

What Do You Want To Do Before You Die?

That is the question that the guys of The Buried Life on MTV asks every week. The Buried Life is about 4 guys who were sick of just going about their daily grind aimlessly so they decided to get together with a list of things they want to do before they die. This week was their season finale and it was fantastic! What they try to do is cross off one list item each episode. And, for every item they cross off of their list, they help someone else cross something off of their own list. Whether they succeed or not, each episode brings me to tears. They are fearless and kind hearted. They're hilarious and generous.

So, at the end of each episode, they ask "What do you want to do before you die?" And, at the end of each episode, I ponder that question for a few minutes before giving up as I usually can't think of anything. Until last night when I decided to blog about it. Once I really took more time to think that question through, my mental list came out pretty huge. So, here are the items I can remember.

Before I die, I would like to see everyone I love and care about happy. I want my brother to stop struggling financially. I want to see him with a good job, with his bills paid, his home out of foreclosure, and money in his pocket. I would love to see him stop smoking. I want to see him secure with a good woman in his life for him and his daughter.

I want to see my sister's business more successful than it is now. I want to see her happy and secure with no more financial struggles.

I want to see my Mom happy and healthy which means that, if it has to be with my Father, I'd like to see him in recovery from his alcoholism.

I want to make all my husband's dreams come true.

I want to find my own success...whatever that may be.

I want to keep in better touch with those whom I rarely hear from.

I want to visit all the lands that my ancestors came from.

I want to finally maintain a permanent exercise routine.

I want to right any wrongs I've done.

I want to patent something.

I want to help just one person by telling the story of my heart condition.

I want to save a life.

I want to make one person smile every day.

I want to have more courage.

I would like to skydive but fear it will literally cause me to have a heart attack.

I want to rescue animals.

I want to be on TV.

I want to have something published somewhere. I want to be brave enough to write the story that is in my head and, even if it isn't a bestseller, finally get it out of my head and between book covers.

I want to put my creativity to a more professional use.

I know there must be so many more things that I want to do before I die but, I am at a standstill as far as ideas right now. Whether I end up fulfilling any of these items or not, only the future will tell. But, it felt a little inspirational committing it to "paper" so to speak.

So, in the great words of Ben, Jonnie, Duncan and Dave of The Buried Life...what do you want to do before you die?

Some Stuff...

I have a few things on my mind. So, I guess I'm just going to use this post to get it off my mind.

First and foremost is my gratitude to members of the military. I don't really have the words to show my appreciation. I can only say that I think of all of you as the most selfless people anywhere. You sacrifice everything to protect our freedom and try to help make the world a better, more peaceful place. While we civilians tend to do everything we can to show you our appreciation, I know that the Government could show you their appreciation in bigger, better ways. I think that they could spare no expense to get you to where you are going. You should be paid insane amounts of money for what you do and the great personal risks you put yourselves in. Perhaps this is all just the imaginings of a spoiled, pampered civilian. I just feel like those who serve should be treated like royalty given all that they are willing to sacrifice so that we may say what we want, think what we think, and live how we live.

Anything else that is on my mind seems air headed and bitter in comparison to what I just got done talking about so, I think I'll just save the rest for later.

Gotta Love Modern Technology

Today was far better than I thought it would be...because of modern technology. I was all prepared to be down for the count for most of the day because I had an eye doctor's appointment and I was anticipating the requisite dilation of my pupils. I have green eyes which means that my eyes are more sensitive to the dilation drops. Some doctors know that it takes less drops to dilate light eyes but, I don't think my doctor knows that and, I like him so, I won't tell him how to do his job. So, I just usually put up with it and spend the majority of my day after dilation hiding from light behind closed eyelids. But, not today! Today I got to use some modern technology. It is Retinal Photography. They take a picture of your eye and it shows them everything they need to know about your eye health. Now, if I had any problems that he would like to take a closer look at, he would have had to dilate my eyes. And, he will likely dilate them next year but, because my eyes are healthy and he didn't see anything alarming, I left his office, for the first time, without squinting in total discomfort! Yay! And, I have stuff to do today. I have a Birthday card and one Thank You card, as-well-as some Christmas cards that I want to make today. I was able to run to the store after my appointment so, I got that errand done. And, I'll be able to make dinner tonight with no discomfort. Gotta love modern technology! Now...if only Dentistry would catch up and make fillings and root canals, as-well-as those gagging x-rays, painless.

Some New Feelings, and Some Old Feelings...

I have talked about this show before in a past post. I still love the show Teen Mom on MTV. But, I have some new opinions on it now. I despise Amber. She is horrible and, I truly think she needs anger management classes...or something. She is horrific to Gary...her ex-boyfriend and the father of their daughter Leah. And, I feel like it is only a matter of time before she is abusive to Leah. She is also a little lazy with her parenting skills. I don't have kids but, I have watched her armchair parent Leah. She will scream at Leah from across the room, either while in bed or on the couch, and keep screaming until she relents that Leah isn't going to listen to her. Then she gets up and corrects the issue. I understand that we never see the entire picture because editing can only show us so much but, if there wasn't that much of that behavior to chose from than editing wouldn't show that much so, I can't really tolerate that as an excuse. On one episode, Gary had just walked through the door and Amber was lounging in bed...which seems to be her favorite place to parent from...and she seemingly immediately started yelling at Gary. Asking him why Leah was crying and when he was going to put her to bed.

Then, there were the times when she would get physical with Gary, and even going as far as to punch him on camera, in the face which resulted in him slamming the other side of his face into a wall. Gary always walks off and avoids the confrontations as much as possible. The poor man can't do anything right. I realize he isn't perfect but, when you can't catch a break, sometimes another person's expectations are just too hard to ever live up to. He bought her flowers in tonight's episode. It was a peace offering. A way to make amends and apologize for all the wrongs that she has perceived him as doing to her. While he was at the flower shop, Amber called him and started yelling at him...as usual. He was beaten down after making such a sweet gesture and broke down in his car. It broke my heart to watch him and, I can only hope that it broke her heart when she watched the episode. She received the flowers the next day and, after such a sweet note and a beautiful bouquet, her comment was that she was glad he didn't try to ask her back in the note. Wow! I was floored. But, I guess I should have seen that coming. She can't see past the nose on her face. Her daughter has her father. There are a lot of teen moms, and many older mothers, that can't say the same thing. Gary has tried to make it work with Amber. He tries to be a good father to Leah. My wish is that, should they ever go into a custody battle, that he gets full, or at least majority custody of Leah.

So, now that I wrote a novel about Amber and Gary, on to my favorite couple...Tyler and Catelynn. Oh how I love these two. They made the tough decision to give their daughter up for open adoption in which they have limited contact with Carly throughout the year. At the beginning of this season it looked like Tyler and Catelynn might break up because of a past transgression that Catelynn had with an old fling. It wasn't a very recent event but, she wasn't truthful with Tyler about it back then and it broke his heart. Eventually they worked it out but, they also had a stressful time when Tyler's grief over giving up their daughter finally hit him and he didn't know how to deal with it. Catelynn had gone to a retreat last year, with other young mothers whom had given up their children for adoption so, she had found an outlet in which to deal with her grief but, Tyler hadn't found anything like that and had pushed it down until it boiled over. He pushed Catelynn away for a little while and, again...it seemed like they were coming to an end. Fortunately, they seem to have worked it all out and are stronger than ever. Catelynn has her mother to deal with on a fairly constant basis. I really want to throttle the woman myself. She's so horrible to Catelynn. She wasn't supportive of their decision to adopt Carly out. And, she has been nothing but vocal about it ever since. She takes every opportunity to bite Catelynn's head off. But, I remain steadfastly impressed by Catelynn's maturity. She far out classes her mother as far as maturity goes and I can't help but feel proud of her for the way that she deals with her mother. I have seen so many teenagers be insolent and even downright disrespectful to their parents but, I never see Catelynn do anything but try to show her mother the respect an adult deserves from a teenager. She is constantly trying to make amends with her mother and to talk things out in a mature and rational manner. And, she always goes above and beyond to make her mother happy. What I would like to see is her mother takes steps towards respecting Catelynn and perhaps apologizing to her for being unfairly hard on her. She's a good kid and a good daughter under some of the worst circumstances.

As for Tyler, his father and Catelynn's mother are married. But, his father is in jail which is an entirely other story. But, Tyler seems to have taken to heart what he has learned from his father and he really has tried to be a great guy to Catelynn. His father is both loved and a little hard to love by both Catelynn and Tyler. These kids have had some of the worst role models and are trying to come out of it better people and, in my opinion, I really think they are succeeding. There are bumps in the road for both of them, both past and present. But, I still hold onto the hope that they will see it through and grow to be that old happy couple that shares their stories with their grandchildren one day.

And now, Farrah and her daughter Sophia...we have gotten to know a little bit of the background story of Sophia's daddy this season. He died in a car accident, I believe before Sophia was ever born. And, if I remember correctly, he and Farrah had an issue in the first season and she cut ties with him. But, she really loved him and she has been struggling with her emotions over losing him and raising their daughter alone.

Farrah's mother...whew! To be fair, Farrah can be difficult herself. Both of them need a serious attitude adjustment. Her mother tries to be sickeningly sweet to Sophia while pushing Farrah's buttons. But, there are times when she isn't even trying to push Farrah's buttons and Farrah will just continue to be a snarly, spoiled brat. I supposed some of that is to be expected. These are teenagers after all. I remember what I was like as a teenager and, I remember the inclination to put such an attitude out there.

So, I have seen that natural mother in Farrah come out this season. She struggled a little in the first season but, she seems to have settled into the role this season and, I'm kind of proud of her. I still think she has a ton of growing up to do but, she has come a long way.

Last but not least, Maci and her son Bentley. She and Bentley's dad, Ryan, are still working on their co-parenting roles but, they broke up and haven't really looked back. Ryan has been seeing a new girl and, up until tonight, Maci had a boyfriend whom she moved an hour away to be closer to. But, because they had only been together for a short period of time, it wasn't long before they realized their mistake and they ended their relationship in tonight's episode.

Ryan wasn't really a father to Bentley until after he and Maci split. I guess it is true that you never know what you had until you've lost it because now he is fighting to stay a part of Bentley's life. They worked out a shared custody between the two of them but, in the previews for next week's season finale, it seems that there may be issues with it on Ryan's part.

Maci is a good mom. She has devoted her entire heart to Bentley. I am sad for her that her new relationship didn't work out but, it was a little to be expected when they moved too fast and it became overwhelming to him.

I still don't like Ryan. It is nice to see that he has stepped up to the plate but, he also seems to constantly want to be a thorn in Maci's side. However, they need to work it out in the way that is best for Bentley and refrain from holding grudges with one another.

So, those are my somewhat new, and mostly old, opinions on this season of Teen Mom.